are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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