He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
