I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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