just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Randomize
