i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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