Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
