I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
