ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
