dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Michael Bay diarrhea
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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