Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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