so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
