1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
