all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
