Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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