We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
