You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
