Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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