My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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