would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
