I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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