just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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