Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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