"it" just moved
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
