I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
