Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
