She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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