At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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