My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
