sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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