all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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