Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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