yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
