I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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