if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
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