Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
