This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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