Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
