This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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