She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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