I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
