I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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