just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
