Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
