I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
