Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
