ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
