I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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