I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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