just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
