your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
