If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
